New Moon Response

Last night--technically this morning--at 3 am, I watched New Moon, part two of the Twilight series. I came with high expectations (knowing that this project had a bigger budget and better director than its indy, low-budget predecessor), and they were fulfilled completely. It really had something for everyone: moviegoers will find humor, action, and sci-fi/fantasy-appeal--much more than in the first film--in addition to the underlying romance.

Speaking of which, fans need not fear that the Romeo & Juliette-inspired love story will be lost amidst special effects and Italian altercations. Edwardians can be assured that they will see their icon as frequently as can be expected given his...location, and Jacobites--well, this is your moment, as you well know. New Moon is Jacob's time in the sun, and boy, does he shine! No need to buy over-priced junk food, folks--the beefcake is flowing in Theater 6.

As for my own team affiliation, I have always been a loyal pro-Edward Twi-guy, but since the movies have come out, I'm seeing things differently. Dare I say I am defecting--no, converting--to Team Jacob? I guess I'm beginning to see the story in a different light--one in which Edward is a controlling jerk, and Jacob is a passionate best friend who seems so good for Bella.

Besides, the scenes featuring Edward toward the end were spectacularly disappointing in at least one aspect: whereas the audience had minutes before drooled over a buff Jacob standing shirtless in the rain (was it me, or was steam actually rising off his muscles?), Edward's chest was unimpressive, sickly-looking, and a tad on the hairy side. Nothing against a little chest hair, but in the book we are led to believe in an Edward whose body resembles cold marble, a stone. And a stone usually doesn't have hair, unless moss or lichen is growing on it. Unfortunately for Pattinson, that is pretty much what it looked like.

Why, Robert? Why couldn't you have gone to the gym once in a while? We know that the once-scrawny Taylor practically lived in the weight room in between the filmings of the shows, so throwing in the occasional bench press doesn't seem like it would have been too much to ask. You're wondering why all of the Edward supporters are flocking to the Jacob banner? Here's a hint: werewolves really are too sexy for their shirts. One moment of unchecked passion and RIIIIP--off come the clothes. You bet Stephanie Meyer understands teenage girls--and they fantasize about more than dating a stone-cold lump of marble, just so you know.

All in all, a fantastic show, and well worth the price of entry. The humor, the kisses (or near-kisses), the flawless representation of the book, all confirmed that the anticipation and wait was not in vain in the least. Now I just need to find a blog widget that will count down the seconds until Eclipse comes out.

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